7 Non-violent Communication exercises and examples to test immediately with your team
Many organisations are now familiar with the model of non-violent communication. The method with the 4 steps of NVC - perceive, feel, need and request - is used worldwide in coaching, leadership and team development.
The good news: the method really works. When teams learn to communicate clearly, give feedback and express their needs without recrimination, there is more trust, less conflict and better cooperation.
But in practice, we often see something different.
Many communication skills trainings remain theoretical. People learn a model, do a short exercise and then revert to their old communication patterns.
Why?
Because connecting communication only works when there is trust, safety and real interaction in a team.
That is why we often use a different approach in a connecting communication workshop: playful exercises, experiential assignments and concrete reflection. In this article, we share several connecting communication examples and exercises communication skills you can use yourself.
In this article
The 4 steps of Non-violent Communication (NVC): a powerful basis for giving feedback
The model of non-violent communication (Marshall Rosenberg) consists of four clear steps:
- Observing - What happens concretely, without judgement
- Feeling - What does this do to me
- Need - What need is below
- Request - What specifically do I ask of the other person
A simple example of connecting communication:
Instead of saying:
“You never communicate clearly.”
say, for example:
“During the last three meetings, I only got the new schedule at the end. That makes me insecure because I like to have an overview. Can you share that information in advance from now on?”
These are typical non-violent communication examples where you combine clear communication with respect for the other person.
This structure helps teams make feedback giving more constructive and clear.
Why classic communication skills training often doesn't work
Many communication skills training courses start immediately with techniques for conversations and feedback.
But teams often struggle with other challenges first:
- little psychological security
- difficult subjects avoided
- humour masking tensions
- frustrations discussed behind the back
- people not really listening to each other
In such a context, a model such as NVC is of little help.
First, you need to build trust.
Therefore, we often start with playful exercises that reveal patterns in communication.
Find out how PM Group was taken through communication skills in one day
Non-Violent Communication examples through games and team exercises
Play is a powerful way to make behaviour visible.
During a game:
- masks fall off faster
- people react spontaneously
- communication patterns become clearly visible
A good game is close to a team's reality, but at the same time remains playful and safe.
Sometimes we even just let the game happen without extensive reflection. Just participating can provide powerful insight.
>> An example of this can be found in our active team building in Brussels.
Exercise 1: making communication and cooperation visible
A great example comes from a trajectory at AEIDL, a project organisation where small teams worked well individually but functioned less as a collective.
We used a simple game task:
- 3 identical building block sets
- 3 teams
- a fourth table for consultation
Phase 1
Teams work separately on a construction task.
Phase 2
The teams must come together to form one joint plan.
The interesting question then becomes:
- Are teams looking for spontaneous consultations?
- Or do they each continue to work on their own island?
This kind of exercise makes communication and collaboration patterns immediately visible.
>> For deeper reflection, you can work with game-based learning
Creating trust: the basis for connecting communication
An important prerequisite for connecting communication is psychological safety.
Team members need to feel:
“I can share something without it being used against me.”
In many teams, the opposite happens:
- difficult subjects are laughed away
- frustrations are not expressed
- the pot is being stirred
This is why many communication skills training courses start better with exercises around listening and perception.
Exercise 2: learning to listen
A simple but powerful exercise is the Toothpick A-B-C game.
In this exercise, one person describes a construct that others have to recreate. The results show how quickly interpretation and assumptions arise in communication.
The exercise makes it clear that communicating clearly requires much more than just talking.
Giving feedback starts with daring to share mistakes
Beneath trust there is often another deeper layer: the ego.
In many organisations, making mistakes is difficult. People defend their position and avoid vulnerability.
But it is precisely the sharing of mistakes that can strengthen cooperation.
Exercise 3: the worst ideas zone
Create a space where making mistakes is explicitly allowed.
For example, let people:
- write down their worst idea
- sharing a failed approach
- coming up with a solution that definitely won't work
The playful nature often creates a surprisingly open conversation.
Are you facing a challenge in collaboration?
Do we really speak out what we think?
Many teams maintain an illusion of harmony.
To avoid conflict, there is silence.
A powerful exercise comes from Patrick Lencioni's model.
Exercise 4: the statement game
For example, you present 15 statements about cooperation to a group.
For each statement, participants choose a position in the room:
- mostly
- sometimes
- rarely
Important: without talking.
The question becomes visible:
Do people dare to stand where they really want to stand?
>> Discover the 15 statements and take the test yourself
Exercises communication skills: expressing feelings and needs
The hardest step of NVC is often expressing your need.
We are more likely to talk in solutions or blame.
But indicate:
- what you feel
- what you need
is a communication skill you can train.
Exercise 5: from individual to group
- Let participants think about the question individually:
What do you need in collaboration? - Use cards with feelings and needs.
- Have participants prepare individually first.
- Then move incrementally to:
- duos
- groups of four
- groups of eight
- entire group
At the end, a clear picture of the most important needs in the team often emerges, and the soft structure allows people to share more confidently what is on their minds.
These are powerful connecting communication examples that help teams understand each other better.
Practising Non-violent communication: asking for and giving help
The final step of connecting communication is the request.
Many people find it difficult to ask for or offer help.
A creative exercise works with painting.
Exercise 6: the connecting canvas
Each participant first creates a painting around the question:
What do I uniquely bring to this team?
Next:
- Place all artworks in the middle
- The group guesses who made which artwork
- The creator tells the story
In a second round, participants may continue working on each other's canvas:
- where can I help you?
- where can you support me?
Literally stepping out of your own box often creates a deep conversation about collaboration.
A lot of the fun is in the surprise itself.
Guiding group discussions using the fishbowl method
Exercise 7: The fishbowl
When a group is large, a conversation can quickly become chaotic.
A powerful method for this is the fishbowl method.
Here's how it works:
- 8 chairs in the middle
- 6 participants take their seats
- 2 seats remain empty
Anyone from the audience who wants to participate can sit on an empty chair. Someone else then stands up.
This method provides:
- dynamics
- focus
- voluntary participation
It is often used within Liberating Structures.
Why a Non-Violent Communication workshop should be different
When teams learn to communicate connectively, it's not just about techniques.
It is about:
- to trust
- listen
- give feedback
- communicate clearly
- vulnerability
Therefore, a NVC workshop works best when it:
- is experiential
- is playful
- creates safety
- combining reflection with action
Only then do models such as the 4 steps of Non-violent Communication really come to life.
May 6, 2026
March 26, 2026
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